WHAT HURTS THE MOST
- John´s always been an ideal son.
- We met in school.
- As a child he was very caring and, like all kids, restless and a bit naughty.
- How old were we? Twelve? Thirteen?
- He used to love to go to school. He had a lot of friends there.
- He wasn´t in my group.
- The truth is he never was a great student.
- I still remember the very first time he came up to me and...
...avoiding eye contact, asked me in a low voice:
“Do you want to do the Visual Arts project with me? “
- He did work hard though and was always very organized.
- I agreed, of course. I admit I also had a crush on him.
- Once he started giggling, he could go on for hours on end.
- He was so ticklish!
- There was no stopping him.
- At first, it wasn´t easy to get closer to him because of his unease and all his giggling.
- He got along with everyone; he had no enemies.
- He ended up becoming one of the group,
and sometimes I felt jealous because my friends loved him more than they did me.
- Other kids´mothers used to say to me:
”Wait until he´s a teenager. They all change drastically.”
- My friends would tell me:
“Now he´s charming because you´ve just started going out. Just wait and see in a couple of months.”
- But, actually, he didn´t change all that much in adolescence.
Well, he was constantly going in and out ...
...but never without giving me a kiss.
- Our relationship grew over time.
- I used to tell him: “The girl that catches you will be a lucky one.”
- And suddenly one day we decided to go steady.
- When he started dating it was amazing, they were always together.
- We spent all our time together.
- Soon he began bringing her for dinner on Sundays.
- His mother´s paella was brilliant.
- She was a delightful girl.
- His family was very nice.
His mother´s a darling; his father is so stylish.
- They had a wonderful courtship.
- We were eager to become of age so we could marry, become independant…
...all those things that people used to do.
- They seemed in a hurry to have kids.
- First of all, we had to finish our studies.
- She studied Nursing, and he, Mechanics.
- We found work right away.
- Everything was going well for them.
- We began saving money.
We wanted to have our own home.
- We helped them with the down payment.
- His parents paid the down payment and mine paid for the furniture.
- Once the house was ready, they started thinking about a wedding date.
- The 18th of April.
- A civil wedding.
- No churches!
- His family are nonbelievers.
- God is one thing, but priests are something else again.
- Well, if there´s no other choice.
- It was a beautiful wedding.
- All family members on both sides were in attendance.
- I don´t recall ever seeing my parents so happy.
- We had a really great time.
- It was like a fairytale.
- But best of all was when my grandchildren were born.
- The first one arrived just a year after our wedding, the second the following year.
- We pretty much brought them up because their parents were working all day long.
- You know, these youngsters want to have it all.
- That´s when trouble began.
- They couldn´t have been happier.
- He was never home.
- He worked for a construction company.
Not really his thing, but it´s what he could find.
- He had lots of work, or, at least, that´s what he used to say.
- The company had projects both in Madrid and in other locations.
- He worked too much.
- He travelled too much.
-Too much. -Too much.
- He was willing to do anything to support his family.
- He hardly brough in any money.
He said the company wasn´t doing well.
- It was a major company.
- He said he didn´t feel comfortable asking for overtime pay.
- He worked as a foreman.
- Where´s anyone seen a supervisor with such scruples?
- He had a lot of weight on his shoulders...
...but he always kept his smile.
- He was short-tempered at home and would give me dirty looks.
- He worshipped his wife.
- We used to argue all the time.
- He was crazy about his kids.
- And he´d yell at the kids for everything and nothing.
- Everything he had was for his family.
- He began to drink.
- He had nothing of his own.
- He squandered all his salary on booze and gambling.
- He was an honorable man.
- There were times when he couldn´t stand up straight.
- He always cared for everyone.
- As time went by, he became more and more inflexible with me and the kids.
- He used to call us every day.
- He made my life hell.
- But that day, I don´t know what happened that day.
- That day…
- He didn´t deserve what happened to him.
- He had lost it. He was throwing everything he could lay his hands on at me.
- He didn´t deserve that.
- He left everything in shambles on his way out.
- He left home like any other day.
- A coworker said he arrived in a rage.
- It was just an ordinary day at work.
- They noticed he reeked of alcohol.
- He was always very responsible.
- He climbed the scaffolding carelessly, without his helmet.
- He always complied with security measures.
- Once he reached the top...
...he started yelling.
- I don´t know, something must have gone wrong.
- They saw him slip.
- The harness…, the clip… God!
- He tried to grab on, but he failed.
- The blow to his head must have been so severe.
- He died on the spot.
- There were so many things he still wanted to do.
- I shouldn´t have contradicted him.
- A tragedy!
- My fault.
- A tragedy!
- He was irresponsible, an alcoholic...
...an abuser.
- An oversight, a mistake, an accident.
- We´ve shattered two thousand cherished memories.
- An unbearable pain.
- Bad luck! I don´t know.
- I still remember the last time I saw him.
- A relief!
- He kissed me and said: ¨I love you, Mom¨
- We´ve shattered two thousand cherished memories.
- I love you.
- He never laid a hand on me, but his words...
- My child.
- ...hurt so much.
- She decided to leave the city with the kids.
- I didn´t tell his parents what their son was really like.
- I haven´t seen them for months.
- I fled from everything that reminded me of him.
- I miss them so much.
- I´m not going back there.
- That day my life grounded to a halt.
That day my light went out.
-That day I recovered my life.
WE TALK ABOUT DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, STATISTICS, AND WE PUT FACES TO BOTH VICTIMS AND PERPETRATORS,
BUT THE FACT IS THAT ALL ACTS OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE HAVE PREVIOUSLY ENTAILED PSYCHOLOGICAL ABUSE.
EVEN IN CASES WHERE PSYCHOLOGICAL ABUSE DOES NOT BECOME PHYSICAL, IT MAY CAUSE THE VICTIM IRREPARABLE HARM.
YOUR HELP IS ESSENTIAL. PLEASE REPORT ANY BEHAVIOR YOU DEEM ABUSIVE BY CALLING THE NATIONAL DOMESTIC VIOLENCE HOTLINE AT 016.
WHAT HURTS THE MOST