1 00:00:57,360 --> 00:00:59,480 - Good morning - Hi, I am Elodie Sorel 2 00:00:59,480 --> 00:01:02,680 - I’m here to see my grandfather, Lucien Sorel. - OK. You know where his room is ? 3 00:01:02,680 --> 00:01:04,560 Yes, I know. Thanks. 4 00:01:29,280 --> 00:01:30,920 Yeah yeah, coming… 5 00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:38,720 Oh... 6 00:01:39,080 --> 00:01:40,840 it’s you. 7 00:01:42,360 --> 00:01:44,080 I am glad to see you. 8 00:01:44,800 --> 00:01:46,360 Well, come in. 9 00:01:55,200 --> 00:01:57,720 It's really dark in here, should I open the curtains? 10 00:01:57,720 --> 00:01:59,240 Yeah, yeah, if you want. 11 00:01:59,240 --> 00:02:02,240 Let me just clean up and I'll be right there . 12 00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:25,520 So…you want to drink something, a coffee maybe…? 13 00:02:25,880 --> 00:02:27,560 No, nothing, thanks. 14 00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:30,800 So, what's up? 15 00:02:31,520 --> 00:02:33,400 I am glad to see you. 16 00:02:33,720 --> 00:02:34,840 Because... 17 00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:36,440 you don't come too often. 18 00:02:37,200 --> 00:02:38,880 I'm fine. You? 19 00:02:39,240 --> 00:02:41,200 Well, like an old man… 20 00:02:41,520 --> 00:02:43,840 What're you gonna do today? Any plans? 21 00:02:43,960 --> 00:02:45,960 Oh no, today’s saturday. 22 00:02:45,960 --> 00:02:49,560 On Saturdays and Sundays, I don't do anything. 23 00:02:50,200 --> 00:02:55,040 - 'Cause you've got a lot going on during the week? - Oh yes, I've got appointments. 24 00:02:55,480 --> 00:02:58,480 First… the speech therapist. 25 00:02:58,840 --> 00:03:01,360 Her office is just behind the church, 26 00:03:01,360 --> 00:03:03,920 it’s easy to walk to, takes me 10 minutes. 27 00:03:04,720 --> 00:03:07,840 Then what else…. Oh yeah, the physiotherapist. 28 00:03:08,120 --> 00:03:10,480 He comes here. 29 00:03:10,840 --> 00:03:12,080 Once a week... 30 00:03:13,320 --> 00:03:16,440 ...has me walk the halls... makes me sit down, stand up… 31 00:03:17,560 --> 00:03:19,760 And then what else do I have? 32 00:03:19,880 --> 00:03:21,840 The… ah, what's the name for that? 33 00:03:22,240 --> 00:03:23,360 The workshops! 34 00:03:23,520 --> 00:03:25,640 They are for all the residents. 35 00:03:25,920 --> 00:03:27,720 There's the memory workshop… 36 00:03:27,920 --> 00:03:28,680 And also... 37 00:03:28,880 --> 00:03:31,280 the balance workshop, my balance isn’t great… 38 00:03:31,480 --> 00:03:34,240 And there's this workshop I like a lot, 39 00:03:34,360 --> 00:03:37,360 - the cooking workshop... - OK, so lots to do. 40 00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:41,040 Anyway, I am not going to stay much longer. 41 00:03:41,360 --> 00:03:42,320 Look at you, 42 00:03:42,840 --> 00:03:45,840 just got there, already want to leave me? 43 00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:48,120 That’s right, I’m leaving you. 44 00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:52,920 Actually, I came to ask you one question, 45 00:03:52,920 --> 00:03:55,960 and I am not leaving until I get an answer. 46 00:03:57,440 --> 00:03:59,000 Well... 47 00:03:59,600 --> 00:04:01,360 aren’t you cheeky?! 48 00:04:01,520 --> 00:04:03,720 Here is the question : 49 00:04:05,400 --> 00:04:08,400 why did you abuse me when I was a child? 50 00:04:11,840 --> 00:04:13,000 Why did I ? 51 00:04:13,440 --> 00:04:16,440 Abuse me when I was a child? 52 00:04:18,280 --> 00:04:19,640 When you were a child? 53 00:04:19,920 --> 00:04:22,920 Yes. When I was 10 or 11. 54 00:04:24,760 --> 00:04:26,400 I abused you? 55 00:04:26,560 --> 00:04:27,280 Yes. 56 00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:30,320 No! 57 00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:31,920 No? 58 00:04:31,920 --> 00:04:33,920 No, no, no no no… 59 00:04:34,880 --> 00:04:36,640 When you were 10 or 11? 60 00:04:37,240 --> 00:04:38,440 Well... 61 00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:42,080 you'll have to tell me what I did 'cause… 62 00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:47,240 this blows my mind. 63 00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:52,040 Why did you come into sexual contact with me? 64 00:04:54,440 --> 00:04:55,280 What? 65 00:04:55,600 --> 00:04:57,480 Lucien, stop it. 66 00:04:58,520 --> 00:05:01,120 Why did you touch me when I was a child? 67 00:05:06,480 --> 00:05:07,760 Can't remember. 68 00:05:08,520 --> 00:05:10,720 You can't remember or you don't want to remember? 69 00:05:12,120 --> 00:05:12,880 But... 70 00:05:13,520 --> 00:05:16,040 No, not that I don't want to. 71 00:05:16,760 --> 00:05:18,600 I can't remember anything. 72 00:05:20,800 --> 00:05:22,160 Hey... 73 00:05:23,720 --> 00:05:26,080 I didn't rape you did I? 74 00:05:26,640 --> 00:05:29,480 What do you mean, "rape"? 75 00:05:29,960 --> 00:05:31,200 Well, 76 00:05:32,600 --> 00:05:34,440 what I mean... 77 00:05:35,040 --> 00:05:36,480 only one thing. 78 00:05:37,200 --> 00:05:38,040 Which is? 79 00:05:40,120 --> 00:05:40,880 Uh... 80 00:05:46,040 --> 00:05:48,880 Sexual contact isn’t "rape"? 81 00:05:49,080 --> 00:05:51,280 When an old man caresses a child 82 00:05:51,280 --> 00:05:54,280 and forces her to caress him as well, it's not "rape"? 83 00:05:56,800 --> 00:05:57,800 Did I do that? 84 00:05:57,800 --> 00:05:59,800 Yes, you did do that. 85 00:06:01,800 --> 00:06:03,560 Is this normal? 86 00:06:04,360 --> 00:06:05,320 No. 87 00:06:07,840 --> 00:06:09,840 So why did you do it? 88 00:06:11,800 --> 00:06:14,200 I can’t remember. 89 00:06:21,080 --> 00:06:23,560 Did you touch other children as well? 90 00:06:26,320 --> 00:06:27,480 My cousins? 91 00:06:27,480 --> 00:06:30,920 Did you touch them when they were young? 92 00:06:30,920 --> 00:06:32,240 Sophie ? 93 00:06:32,480 --> 00:06:33,760 Marianne ? 94 00:06:34,240 --> 00:06:35,560 Juliette ? 95 00:06:38,280 --> 00:06:40,920 Surely not. I don't remember. 96 00:06:42,880 --> 00:06:44,160 And your daughter? 97 00:06:44,280 --> 00:06:46,720 Did you touch her when she was a child? 98 00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:47,760 No. 99 00:06:48,760 --> 00:06:49,640 Never. 100 00:06:49,760 --> 00:06:52,960 Oh, "never". So, for her you remember it was "never"? 101 00:06:52,960 --> 00:06:55,560 The others, you can't remember? Me, you don’t remember? 102 00:06:56,720 --> 00:06:58,640 But Elodie… you... 103 00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:01,160 you know that I've had a stroke, so… 104 00:07:01,400 --> 00:07:04,400 there are many things I've forgotten, you know… 105 00:07:11,360 --> 00:07:13,360 The last time I came to visit you, 106 00:07:13,720 --> 00:07:16,120 you told me a lot of things about May '68 107 00:07:16,440 --> 00:07:17,800 lots of details. 108 00:07:17,920 --> 00:07:19,720 You could remember the strikes at the factory, 109 00:07:19,880 --> 00:07:21,840 the demonstrations in Grenoble, all of that… 110 00:07:22,280 --> 00:07:23,240 And the time before that, 111 00:07:23,320 --> 00:07:25,840 you told me about your role during the resistance, 112 00:07:25,840 --> 00:07:26,960 in the maquis du Vercors, 113 00:07:26,960 --> 00:07:29,920 and for that also, you had an amazing amount of details, 114 00:07:29,920 --> 00:07:32,680 adresses, codenames, sabotage... 115 00:07:33,160 --> 00:07:38,040 But all thatwas before what I’mtalking about. 116 00:07:38,840 --> 00:07:41,880 You were 60, and I was 10. 117 00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:48,400 So, you can remember much older things, but not that? 118 00:07:54,360 --> 00:07:56,320 So this is why you came ? 119 00:07:56,640 --> 00:07:59,040 Yes, that’s why I came, yes. 120 00:08:00,080 --> 00:08:02,400 To understand. 121 00:08:02,400 --> 00:08:03,240 Why? 122 00:08:04,760 --> 00:08:07,080 I just want to know : why? 123 00:08:13,360 --> 00:08:15,160 I can’t remember. 124 00:08:24,080 --> 00:08:25,560 You were frustrated? 125 00:08:27,200 --> 00:08:29,840 You were missing sex with Granny right? 126 00:08:30,320 --> 00:08:32,000 Or were you just a sex addict, 127 00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:34,000 ready to jump on any woman… 128 00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:35,760 or any little girl? 129 00:08:39,720 --> 00:08:41,240 I can’t remember. 130 00:08:42,400 --> 00:08:43,840 I swear I can’t. 131 00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:54,640 Ok. 132 00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:59,040 So, I will tell you what I can remember. 133 00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:01,360 For a year, 134 00:09:02,360 --> 00:09:05,600 I stayed with you every Tuesday night and Wednesday. 135 00:09:06,200 --> 00:09:10,240 When Granny Simone went to bed, or was reading in her room, 136 00:09:11,120 --> 00:09:12,840 you would come to see me. 137 00:09:12,840 --> 00:09:16,600 You would come into this little room, where I slept, where the TV was. 138 00:09:18,480 --> 00:09:19,520 And then... 139 00:09:21,720 --> 00:09:24,720 you would open your dressing gown, 140 00:09:25,280 --> 00:09:28,280 and you would ask me to caress you. 141 00:09:29,560 --> 00:09:31,160 Your penis. 142 00:09:33,400 --> 00:09:36,400 You don't remember that ? 143 00:09:41,680 --> 00:09:43,200 That very same year, 144 00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:46,720 we went to Montagny to ski, to the Charlet’s apartment. 145 00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:54,440 You were there, and Granny, my brother who was maybe 5 at the time, and I was there. 146 00:09:54,880 --> 00:09:56,800 Whose apartment? 147 00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:58,120 The Charlets’. 148 00:09:58,400 --> 00:10:00,240 Who are the Charlets ? 149 00:10:00,720 --> 00:10:05,200 Jacques and Thérèse Charlet, your great friends they lent you the Montagny apartment, every winter... 150 00:10:05,320 --> 00:10:07,520 Well, that week, same thing. 151 00:10:07,520 --> 00:10:10,200 Every night, when I went to bed, 152 00:10:11,640 --> 00:10:12,800 you’d come find me 153 00:10:13,960 --> 00:10:15,920 and you’d lay down next to me. 154 00:10:16,360 --> 00:10:17,880 You don’t remember that ? 155 00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:30,040 No. 156 00:10:33,360 --> 00:10:34,800 Fine. 157 00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:37,320 You don’t remember. 158 00:10:38,480 --> 00:10:39,720 But I feel like, 159 00:10:39,720 --> 00:10:43,200 you don’t seem surprised by what I am telling you? 160 00:10:46,840 --> 00:10:48,800 Oh, yes, I’m surprised. 161 00:10:49,760 --> 00:10:50,960 But you still have a doubt 162 00:10:50,960 --> 00:10:53,120 ‘cause you do not firmly deny it. 163 00:10:57,120 --> 00:11:01,840 You can always pretend you're 91 and you've forgotten things. It's easy. 164 00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:06,800 But, from everything I’ve told you, nothing surprises you, 165 00:11:06,800 --> 00:11:09,520 so, something must have happened. 166 00:11:11,280 --> 00:11:11,880 But... 167 00:11:14,920 --> 00:11:17,040 I didn’t rape you, did I ? 168 00:11:17,680 --> 00:11:18,480 ”You”? 169 00:11:19,120 --> 00:11:21,040 What do you mean, "you"? 170 00:11:21,440 --> 00:11:23,920 Who else did you rape Lucien? 171 00:11:23,920 --> 00:11:25,560 How many of them did you rape, for fuck' sake? 172 00:11:25,640 --> 00:11:28,320 I didn't rape anyone !! 173 00:11:29,280 --> 00:11:31,160 When you caress a child, 174 00:11:31,320 --> 00:11:34,880 and you force this child to caress you, 175 00:11:35,160 --> 00:11:36,680 that’s not "rape"? 176 00:11:38,200 --> 00:11:39,120 No… 177 00:11:39,440 --> 00:11:41,600 No? What is it then ? 178 00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:46,920 When you caress a child, 179 00:11:48,560 --> 00:11:51,240 it might be without an ulterior motive. 180 00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:55,760 Is caressing a child's breasts, or genitals, 181 00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:58,400 "without an ulterior motive"? 182 00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:02,560 I never did such a thing. 183 00:12:02,560 --> 00:12:03,800 Yes you did ! 184 00:12:04,040 --> 00:12:07,680 You might not remember it, but I do, and perfectly ! 185 00:12:07,960 --> 00:12:10,040 And this is why I am here. 186 00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:12,720 To find out why. 187 00:12:17,760 --> 00:12:19,720 But you don’t have an answer 188 00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:31,120 It’s easy to talk about it now 189 00:12:32,600 --> 00:12:35,320 Because I should have said something sooner? 190 00:12:39,840 --> 00:12:42,000 Maybe. 191 00:12:43,680 --> 00:12:46,480 'cause I might have remembered. 192 00:12:48,560 --> 00:12:51,160 I could have fucked up your life. 193 00:12:52,440 --> 00:12:56,000 What do you think would have happened if I had told granny? Or my parents? 194 00:12:56,000 --> 00:12:59,120 I think it would have made some noise in the family… 195 00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:03,840 I have protected you for 32 years, 196 00:13:03,840 --> 00:13:07,360 and now you're telling me I should have talked sooner ? 197 00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:10,840 I’m not sure of that. 198 00:13:11,160 --> 00:13:13,680 Your life would have been pretty different. 199 00:13:20,680 --> 00:13:23,200 You really make me sad, now. 200 00:13:24,040 --> 00:13:26,440 Don't worry, it's mutual. 201 00:13:30,400 --> 00:13:32,520 Why am I making you sad? 202 00:13:36,520 --> 00:13:38,640 Because there are things… 203 00:13:39,760 --> 00:13:41,160 I didn't want... 204 00:13:41,920 --> 00:13:43,360 to remember... 205 00:13:45,400 --> 00:13:46,400 to... 206 00:13:47,240 --> 00:13:49,320 to live over again... and... 207 00:13:51,160 --> 00:13:54,160 ...to be sorry for, mostly. 208 00:13:59,880 --> 00:14:01,560 Because there are things 209 00:14:03,080 --> 00:14:05,000 you didn't want to remember, 210 00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:07,400 live over again, 211 00:14:08,080 --> 00:14:11,600 and be sorry for, is this what you're telling me ? 212 00:14:13,920 --> 00:14:14,720 Yes. 213 00:14:22,640 --> 00:14:24,480 Well, I’m gonna let you 214 00:14:24,760 --> 00:14:25,920 remember. 215 00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:28,720 Live it over again. 216 00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:31,920 And be sorry. 217 00:14:42,240 --> 00:14:43,880 Goodbye Lulu. 218 00:14:44,920 --> 00:14:47,920 This is the last time you’ll see me. 219 00:14:54,080 --> 00:14:56,560 And if there's an afterlife, 220 00:14:58,160 --> 00:15:01,840 even if I doubt you and I will be in the same place… 221 00:15:04,840 --> 00:15:07,480 Don't come near me.